Have you ever cringed over someone else's words or actions? What you are feeling is 100% real and do not second guess it. 


Your experience is the ICK. I have experienced the ick more than once. Every single guy I talk to online or in person has given me ick and it doesn't anywhere. My experience with ice has me aware of certain actions and behaviours in romantic partners and strangers, too. It's so easy to get sick from modern-day dating and meeting new people. The ick is a way of expressing disgust. A ick is a modern term describing the feeling about a cringe moment or experience that left you feeling that way. The Ick is a relatable term if you are in modern-day dating, friendship, family or meeting someone new. Ick is most common in romantic relationships. 


Christie Kederian, a psychologist, relationship expert, and LMFT explains the term: “The ick is this feeling that you get in the early stages of a dating relationship — you could also feel it later on, but most often in the early stages — where you get disgusted or turned off by some mannerism or action that the person you’re dating does,” she says according to Today.


I believe the source of the ick is often minor behaviour that turns you completely off. Ick is a mini dealbreaker that has red flags that are personal and surprising at the moment. The ick is irreversible once you see it coming. You see the behaviour more and more. Your standards rise when you see the ick. 


Talking about sex before you know the person, poor personal hygiene, rudeness to wait staff, discussing past relationships, lying, not holding a conversation, or not following up with you are all bad examples. Major personal icks are not putting in enough effort on dates, not planning dates, asking you to pay for the dates and acting differently in real life after texting. 


As soon as you start dating someone new and get to know them, you enter a love bubble. After a few dates, an ick can happen at any time. The ick is a dealbreaker, and people part ways. You can't ignore the ick because it will resurface. You can't continue with a person when the problem is too big. 


Can a relationship survive the ick? It depends on the relationship and whether this is worth fighting for. When the ick comes up in your romantic relationship that is when you reflect and communicate with your partner. This is your decision to make rather than to stay or leave. The ick can be the end or beginning of new standards and moving on. 



The stages of getting the ick in the moment


1. When you get the ick - you think about it 

2. You don't address the issue in the moment 

3. You keep thinking about it and you don't know what to do

4. You get to move on from the issue

5. You can't recover from the ick 


Stages of an ick


1. It's not right - you scream in your head

2. You feel it in your gut 

3.You feel weird about the situation and you stop thinking about it 

4. Your disgusted 

5. You turned off

6. Talking and ranting about it a few times 

7. The decision

8. You can't get over it

9. You mourn it 

10. Moving on 

11. Let it go of the situation

12. You may think about time to time

13. It's best thing that happened to you and you dodge a bullet